Stage-Land

Name: Stage-Land
Author: Jerome K. Jerome

by Jerome K. Jerome

Pages: about 69
Category: Literature & Fiction
Language: English
Reading time: 76 min at 250 wpm

Start readingThe whole book, as cards or one word at a time. 42 min at 450 wpm in Read mode.

From the opening

THE HERO THE VILLAIN THE HEROINE THE COMIC MAN THE LAWYER THE ADVENTURESS THE SERVANT GIRL THE CHILD THE COMIC LOVERS THE PEASANTS THE GOOD OLD MAN THE IRISHMAN THE DETECTIVE THE SAILOR
His name is George, generally speaking. "Call me George!" he says to the heroine. She calls him George (in a very low voice, because she is so young and timid). Then he is happy.
The stage hero never has any work to do. He is always hanging about and getting into trouble. His chief aim in life is to be accused of crimes he has never committed, and if he can muddle things up with a corpse in some complicated way so as to get himself reasonably mistaken for the murderer, he feels his day has not been wasted.
He has a wonderful gift of speech and a flow of language calculated to strike terror to the bravest heart. It is a grand thing to hear him bullyragging the villain.
The stage hero is always entitled to "estates," chiefly remarkable for their high state of cultivation and for the eccentric ground plan of the "manor house" upon them. The house is never more than one story high, but it makes up in green stuff over the porch what it lacks in size and convenience.
The chief drawback in connection with it, to our eyes, is that all the inhabitants of the neighboring village appear to live in the front garden, but the hero evidently thinks it rather nice of them, as it enables him to make speeches to them from the front doorstep--his favorite recreation.
These "estates" are a great anxiety to the stage hero. He is not what you would call a business man, as far as we can judge, and his attempts to manage his own property invariably land him in ruin and distraction.

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Stage-Land

From the opening

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